I fell in love with Jesus Christ at first sight about 40 years ago and have lived a Christ-only life ever since. Today I would like to talk about that encounter.
1. Confession of faith in the midst of withdrawing from society
When I was a college student, I was suffering from “withdrawal from society" due to fear of other people. At the time, there was no Internet, the word “hikikomori” did not exist, and not much was known about mental illness, so I truly believed that I was the worst person in the world and should die.
However, my life changed drastically when I happened to walk into an English conversation cafe run by an American missionary near my university!
When I discussed my problems there, I prayed “I believe in the Lord Jesus Christ” with a very light heart. However, I was a scientific-thinking atheist, so I actually did not believe at all. I started attending church, but I did not understand the sermons or the Bible at all.
2. Repentance from sin
One day, one of the sisters in the church said to me, "You must put Jesus Christ first."
I still did not understand what she meant by that, but for some reason, those words struck a chord in my heart and my heart ached. Out of a sense of wonder and the bitterness of shutting myself in, I prayed without really thinking, “God, why is the way I’m living so painful and hard?”
Immediately, a thought arose in my heart.
"It is because of your sin.”
From that moment on, I began to pray as if I were wrestling. I did not hear voices, but I received advice from others, thoughts came to my mind, and words from the Bible jumped off the pages as I read them, and gradually I began to have conversations with God.
“The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand; repent and believe in the gospel.” (Mark 1:15, NASB)
First of all, these words resonated in my heart.
3. The sin of making anything other than Jesus Christ my God
“But repent of what?” I thought.
Suddenly, the Bible verse,
“You shall worship the Lord your God and serve Him only.” (Matthew 4:10, NASB)
came to mind, and I understood that “There is only one God. It is a sin to serve other gods at the same time as the Lord Jesus or to value other things more than Him.”
This is what the Bible calls the sin of idolatry. So I repented one by one of the gods of the shrines, Buddhism, fortune-telling, superstition, rituals and customs held at shrines and temples, etc. that I had believed in before.
I also repented of putting my father, who was a big presence in my life, and my teachers and leaders, whom I trusted and admired very much, ahead of Jesus in my life. I had ignored the Lord Jesus and relied on and followed such people as if they were gods.
I also repented of my science-first atheism, my worship of money, my work-first mentality, my academic background, my sense of beauty, and so on. The values and ideas that take precedence over the Bible are a form of idolatry.
Furthermore, in Japan, idolatry is ingrained in every corner of our lives and customs, such as nature worship that deifies beautiful nature as God, sun worship that deifies the sun as the providence of the heavens, and belief in that God even dwells in objects made by humans. I repented of this as well.
I also repented of other sins, such as lying, envy, anger, hatred, and unfaithfulness, but at the core, I thoroughly repented of giving priority to any god other than Jesus Christ. I other words, this is the sin of not having Jesus Christ “as God,” “not having Him as one’s Lord,” and “not believing in Him”.
And each time, I realized the things in my life that were “gods”, I made the declaration,
“I renounce ____________ . Jesus alone is God. I will serve only Jesus.”
4. Jesus is a God far more wonderful than I had ever imagined
After several days of prayer, one day at dawn, I suddenly had the following thought, which illuminated my heart like a beam of light, and I realized the love of God.
“The Lord Jesus Christ, the God who created all things, is alive! He knows everything about me and all my dirty sins, but all my sins are forgiven! Actually, the devil is in control of this world, and I have been under the devil’s control, but I believe in God now. I have been born again, and I am now under God's control! I am a child of God.
I am loved by the Lord Jesus Christ!!!”
Then I prayed as if shouting.
“Lord! You are wonderful, far beyond anything I can imagine. I will follow You for the rest of my life!” Immediately after that, I fell into a deep sleep.
5. A fresh start in life as a Christian, healing from the fear of others
“If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” (2 Corinthians 5:17, ESV)
When I awoke in the morning, intense joy and peace, like an ocean, flooded the depths of my heart.
My heart was reborn (I received the Holy Spirit)! This is the creation of a new life.
My fear of other people and withdrawing from society were also healed! After that, I was led step by step by Jesus, returned to school, got a job, got married, … Yes, I have faced many trials, but I am living a blessed life.
It was truly love at first sight with the Lord Jesus. The emotion of this encounter comes back to me so vividly that I cannot talk about it without tears even now.
If there are people reading this who do not yet believe in Jesus Christ, I want you to know Him, too.
Jesus Christ is an amazing God, far beyond anything you can imagine right now.
I hope you will experience and taste the joy and wonder of knowing Him.
"Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him. "-1 Corinthians 2: 9-
